Hey everyone. So we now know that Raymond Cotton, the former Auburn commitment who instead signed with Ole Miss, has announced plans to leave Ole Miss.To be fair, I'd be upset as well if the Rebels' No. 1 quarterback rolled on down to the Manning
This odd turn for Cotton adds intrigue for me. Everyone who knew about Cotton in 2008, when he was a high prospect, understood that his top priority was playing time. He walked away from a mid-level SEC program that needed a quality quarterback and landed at a mid-level SEC program that didn't need a quality quarterback as badly.
As decisions go, that won't be nominated for the Hall of Fame.
Either way, I'm hoping Cotton finds what he's seeking.
Also: Jeremiah Masoli?
WINNER!
ReplyDeleteReading "mid-level" stings.
ReplyDeleteJeremiah was a bullfrog.
ReplyDeleteAuburn in 2008 was not upper-level ... and if you think Auburn was upper-level then, you need to seek help at Bradford. Immediately.
ReplyDeleteI never said it wasn't accurate, but it still stings to read.
ReplyDeleteI concur, RK.
ReplyDeleteThey aspired to be mid-level.
ReplyDeleteI don't need no stinking Bradford.
Norm, we called you for the flip today, and you were nowhere to be found.
ReplyDeleteNot good.
On an unrelated note: The more I review Auburn's projected offense, it's getting obvious:
ReplyDeleteGus and the boys are going to unleash some fury.
That's assuming Fannin doesn't get hurt or fumble a lot, Newton is at least as good as Chris Todd and Terrell Zachery (or someone of that ilk) becomes a 1A-type of receiver.
stings a LOT.
ReplyDeleteI feel bad for the kid.
ReplyDeleteThat feeling has now passed. He was cocky through the process and when Auburn hit a bump in the road and bailed.
I wonder if Enrique Davis has regrets, and if he does, he and Patrick Trahan can both go take a long walk off a short pier.
I am also a bitter, bitter man.
ReplyDeletelot of assumptions there, JGT. I hope they all come to fruition.
ReplyDeleteIs Trahan still there? He's gotta be 24 years old.
ReplyDeleteI'm all for the fury being unleashed.
ReplyDeleteEnrique Davis made a bad decision.
ReplyDeleteThem's the facts. He'd be the No. 1 tailback at Auburn right now had he honored his commitment. The last No. 1 is about to make a lot of money in the NFL.
I have to disagree with Davis being #1 if he were at Auburn. I'd take Fannin over the Ole Miss crew in front of him any day.
ReplyDeleteWhat was the deal with Trahan leaving? It was apparently pretty low on my radar at the time as I don't remember what it was about. I remember he was hurt, that's about it.
ReplyDeleteLove the title, Jay. Cotton would definitely been in the mix at QB last season. I understand the switch, but it turned out to be a very bad idea.
ReplyDeleteI think it's time for AUnMobilz to stop by and say hello.
ReplyDeleteWait, are we unleashing the fury or the furby?
ReplyDeleteIf it's the furby, then I'm not so sure.
We have lost a lot of talent to Ole Miss in recent years. Powe was once thought to be coming to Auburn.
ReplyDeletePowe was also once thought to be literate.
ReplyDeleteTrahan - got into a little academic situation and tried to lie his way out of it(per Walt McFadden).
ReplyDeleteCotton - was committed to Tuberville, but not necessarily Auburn. If TT was still here, so would Cotton.
Keeping with the Ole Miss motif, maybe if our defense can make some noise and we can call the 2010 Auburn team "The Sound And The Fury".
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly what Walt said and I have no reason to think he was wrong.
ReplyDeleteSo is Fannin's shoulder 100%? The last I recall, he was running around on the field in the bowl game with one arm. I didn't hear any mention of it in the Spring, so I'm assuming he's fine to take a season of punishment on that shoulder o' his?
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of former scholar linebackers, I don't think Tray Blackmon's Canadian football career is continuing this year.
ReplyDeleteHowever Damon Duval still continues to show the consistency that he never had in college.
The Little Dime Bag of Hate finished? Sad.
ReplyDeleteDamon Duval. One of the most infuriating players in the history of Auburn football.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteDamon Duval was no Scott Etheridge.
ReplyDeleteJamming to my favorite Billy Powell song he played with those other guys. THT knows who. I'll probably listen to his one again but turn it up to 11.
ReplyDeletewho gave us weekly CFL AU alum updates last year?
ReplyDeleteWas it AUBigCat?
BP was awesome.
ReplyDeleteThe piano player, not the oil co.
I have absolutely no idea how this just now began happening - I'm receiving Text alerts on my phone with each comment here. So, I'll get a text alert telling me that I just posted a comment to this fine blog. Curious.
ReplyDeletei think it was BigCat with the CFL updates.
ReplyDeleteNorm: Michael just posted a comment.
ReplyDeleteNorm - do you just get text alerts for your posts, or also for the good ones?
ReplyDeleteTexts alerting me that each of you are posting a comment. It's not judging the quality of said post, I do that myself.
ReplyDeleteMaybe there aren't enough opportunities for the kind of crime Masoli is accused of in Mississippi?
ReplyDeleteI'm reaching...
RK - "mid-level" is very fair and accurate. Truth is truth.
ReplyDeleteOther than Brandon Cox, when was the last time we had a first time starter at QB come in and have a good season?
ReplyDeleteThis Stan White moment is brought to you by SteveFC.
ReplyDeleteWhite is the one I was thinking about too. It is a rarity.
ReplyDeletePatrick Nix was good for a 9-1-1 record in his first year. D. Craig was good in 96, just didn't have any help.
ReplyDeleteoh, if only D-Craig had a good running back.
ReplyDeleteSIGH.
no offense Fred Beasley. i'm talking to you Rusty Williams!
We couldn't run block very well once we went to the Dameyune spread.
ReplyDeleteHello Monk's Corner SC
ReplyDeleteTrue enough for Craig and Nix, but they, along with Cox, had each been groomed in the program for a couple years. Stan went to Senior prom and was the starting QB in the SEC three months later.
ReplyDeletePuppet Hour. Ahh.
ReplyDeleteAAAHfosdjg lkdfjgl;rtk-03ig iegierkjgiopergfg
ReplyDeleteaksjgnjk naortgjmoiujertg Norm's Inbox Clogged lksfg ksjdgiopwejk l;ksdgl; sdgdsf
ReplyDeleteI think that Stan and Jason Campbell were victims of being thrown to the wolves too soon. Both had great senior years but also took their share of lumps on their way to same.
ReplyDeleteI think Stan was a redshirt freshman QB in 1990.
ReplyDeleteJust got back from a quasi-cool weekend in Highlands, NC. Note to self: next time pick a cooler weekend. It was in the mid 80's up there. I realize the rest of the east coast was wallowing in near 100 degree temps, but that's just too dang hot for up there.
ReplyDeleteMid level? yup! To quote the Alabama trailer Dwellers favorite Midget: "It is was it is"
Masoli probably is a bullfrog, but he is also a dang good playmaking QB and OM needs something good to happen. If I was Nutt, I would gamble on him. BTW, I'm glad I'm not Nutt and don't have to make that choice.
How many days till practice starts?
Dan ...how many true freshman SEC QB's have ever shined their first year? I'm betting less than 5%.
ReplyDeleteCotton leaving OM is a good example of why I don't get too worked up over recruits. I was afraid some of the AU recruitniks were gonna jump off one of the I65 bridges when he went to OM.
ReplyDeleteNorm gets my vote for avatar of the week.
ReplyDeleteAs for Cotton, he has a lot of potential. He looked a lot like Jason Campbell when I watched some high school clips. I think he just made some bad choices. If I remember correctly, his dad was a bit too involved too.
This does muddy the waters of if it were better to get Rollison or Cotton. Both look like busts at this point.
anyone want to come take my place at this stupid mtg?
ReplyDeleteCan someone loan me an ark? We are having some of the worst thunderstorms I can remember at the moment.
ReplyDeleteas I sit here HABOTNing during this
ReplyDeletemtg, I wonder how to refresh on iPhone w/o having to scroll back to the top
SIAP, but the Titan's are apparently suing Kiffin and Southern Cal..
ReplyDeletefunny stuff
Are you actually scrolling or are you just tapping the top of the window. Tapping the top of the browser window scrolls it up real fast for you...
ReplyDeletegood stuff, FSJ
ReplyDeletedid u see my iPhone scrolly ? above
ur the best banner, FSJ, if there is such a thong
ReplyDeletehere I am suffering through a mtg and FSJ is the only one helping keep me awake.
ReplyDeleteHoopie:
ReplyDeleteI agree, if you have to start a true or even RS freshman, you are in for a bumpy ride. It would be nice to roll out a few consecutive jrs who have been "in the system" for a while before starting.
I think starting Newton this year is a little different than starting a Fr or redshirt Fr. Plus after two years I think we will have a good line of QBs ready to take over.
ReplyDeleteCH=B, you are right and I hope that bodes well for AU this fall.
ReplyDeletewe're obviously getting closer to football season; there's a bit of autumn crispness in the air. It's just 8 pm and we've already dipped below 90 devrees
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing. It is already down to 77F here. The other night I went out at about midnight and it was 91F.
ReplyDeleteSensi,
ReplyDeleteI just said it stung to read, I didn't make a comment one way or the other as to if it was accurate or not.
Eric Smith
ReplyDeleteThe forgptten Stud.
He will play alot and show why Auburn is Tailback U.
digger, I am really hope Eric Smith does a lot this season. We really need the depth in the backfield.
ReplyDeleteI believe he will step up this year a been one of the stand-out players. He seems to be a Ronnie brown type guy, not saying he is that good but just saying.
ReplyDeleteDigger is right on the money. Eric Smith is often forgotten, but the dude can play. He has great hands, surprising quickness for a guy his size and could be a beast in short yardage/goal line situations.
ReplyDeleteIn terms of being a do it all type player, I can see that.
ReplyDeleteDon't you hate it when you a listening to America's got talent and you are wondering why they don't give the guy the buzzer, and then you realize it is a musical guest. Man, I hate when that happens.
ReplyDeleteI hope I didn't jinks Eric but He does have many skills that should be utilized this year.
ReplyDeleteActually, I am pretty amazed we didn't hear more about Eric in the Spring. It will be interesting to see how he is used.
ReplyDeletefrom collegefootball.rivals.com
ReplyDeleteESPN announced some changes in its broadcasting crews for SEC games this season. For the SEC Network's Game of the Week, Dave Neal will continue as play-by-play man with former Heisman winner Andre Ware as the analyst. For the weekly ESPNU game at noon, Rob Stone will do play-by-play and former Georgia All-America defensive end David Pollack will be the analyst. And for the Saturday night SEC game on ESPNU, Clay Matvick will be the play-by-play guy and former NFL coach Herm Edwards the analyst.
NCAA interviewing only one player at Georgia
ReplyDeletewhat, no Brock Huard THT? what a travesty.
ReplyDeletehow is Toledo doing this?
ReplyDeletethat's very odd. somebody must know somebody or have been their old pimp. guess we should ask Saban. he knows of such things.
ReplyDeleteyou know who doesn't need a pimp?
ReplyDeleteTHT....
ReplyDeleteBEASLEY!!!
ReplyDeleteand HELLLLOOOOOOO KENNESAW, GEORGIA!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteyou can't stop the Beasley post. you can only hope to contain it.
ReplyDeleteI feel like this class that's coming in is going to change the face of Duke football
ReplyDeletePerhaps, but I'm guessing it's going to need a lot of botox, too.
we make a great team, ScottieB!
ReplyDeletehe must think he's all that & a bag of chips.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteoops, inadvertent double post.
ReplyDeleteNumber 1 rated RB in country to choose between ua-t and TX. We need to convince him that he belongs in TX.
ReplyDeleteTX class almost full.
someone needs to paint a big 'hook em' on his house. go to texas!
ReplyDeletethis would be a great spot for a Zach Clayton blast....but i'm not going to go there.
ReplyDeleteHoly Toledo!!
ReplyDeleteWhy on earth would Miami do that?
Toledo's stadium seats 26,000, but 36,000 if you include lawn chairs?
ReplyDeleteAnyone else watching Garza's bid for a no no? I would love to be at a no hitter. The fans seem to really get into it, even the opposing fans.
ReplyDeletenope. i'm rocking the computer & wifey is watching 'Ghost Whisperer'. the only reason i can deal with that is Jennifer Love. no other reason.
ReplyDeleteJLH is very hot!!
ReplyDeleteyup. mrs. scottie was watching some movie yesterday on some chick channel where she was a massage therapist of the erotic kind. the 2 minutes i watched were not too bad. ha.
ReplyDeleteTop of the 9th, 1 down.
ReplyDelete2 out!
ReplyDeleteNO NO!!!
ReplyDeletesweet.
ReplyDeleteok, i'm off to dominate the digital SEC world of my ps3 before bed. nite.
ReplyDeleteThe year of the pitcher continues.
ReplyDeletethey'll be shaving another 6" off the mound
ReplyDeleteInteresting stat, the Rays have been no hit twice and now they have a no hitter. I would have to guess that doesn't happen very often.
ReplyDeleteThat is this year.
ReplyDeleteOk just got my answer. They are the 1st team since '91 to get no hit and throw a no hitter, but I bet no team has been no hit twice and then thrown a no hitter.
ReplyDeleteI think the pitchers are juiced.
They actually raised the mound in the off season, so I guess they are getting what they wanted by doing that.
ReplyDeleteThe mound is also juiced.
ReplyDeleteI also think Nomar's hair is juiced. I think the producers of Jersey Shore probably call him for hair tips.
ReplyDeleteI was all pumped about the no no and then I looked at my fantasy team. Yep, the guy I'm playing has Garza.
ReplyDeleteHerm Edwards?
ReplyDelete"You PLAY to WIN the GAME!"
raised the mound? who, what when how why? I couldn't find that, but I don't keep up with the game anymore.
ReplyDeleteDid anyone else see Rivals' preseason 120 countdown? They have Auburn coming in at #39. 39 is that a joke. I'm not saying top 15 or anything but 39.
ReplyDeleteCH=B ...
ReplyDeleteWe've got to prove ourselves. We're a team that went 3-5 in the league last year and we've got a new quarterback and three safeties that were all seriously injured in the last year.
I'm optimistic, and think we can win 10, but there's a lot of question marks right now we've got to turn into exclamation points.
The bottom line is that the difference between a top 20 team in the country and the 40th best is not that far. It requires beating Kentucky at home, not getting abused by Arkansas, and finishing off either Georgia or Alabama.
Thirty something seems fair enough at this point with so many unanswered questions.
ReplyDeleteWhether Fannin can be the primary ball carrier is a huge question. Dyer won't likely be able to do that. I am sure he could run, but blocking and receiving probably aren't there yet. Eric Smith might be the fall back. I can see FAH carrying the ball 20+ times a game.
QB is still a huge question mark. My guess is that naming Cam number 1 was because of concerns with his passing. If he isn't the guy, Caudle will be.
The defense must show significant improvement. I am very encouraged by comments about a lot of the new defensive players, but we need to make it through the MSU, Clempson, USCe stretch and get those guys some experience.
We showed positive signs last season, but there are just too many question marks to make this a top 20 team. It wouldn't surprise me to be in there are at the end of the season, but not now.
Make that a can't on FAH.
ReplyDeleteHow many running backs do they recruit for their blocking ability? Not many I'm thinking. If you can tote the rock, they'll try to teach you the rest.
ReplyDeleteIf you can't block, you don't play. Malzahn wants players that can do multiple things. Even the receivers must block, or they set the bench. One of the main criticism of FAH is his blocking, or lack there of.
ReplyDeleteTitans suing Kiffen? I love the continued Kiffen drama, but this lawsuit is a reach. Claiming that Kiffen "interfered" with the Titans coach's contract would require proving that the contract contained clauses requiring notice to the Titans that interviews were going to happen and proving that Kiffen had knowledge of those clauses.
ReplyDeleteSports agents are totally aware of the amateur contracts requirements and should seemingly be liable for contract interference.
Kiffikin is on my short list of coaches to become quality high school coaches. The guy has a lot of growing up to do, and he is doing his growing up in a too high profile place.
ReplyDeleteHoopie - the contract required WRITTEN permission from the Titans before the former ass't could consider other job offers.
ReplyDeleteIt would seem suing the assistant would make much better sense. Kiffikin could plead ignorance, and he has a lot of evidence to back him up.
ReplyDeletecadillac and kenny irons found out that "can't block don't play" crap. coaches found out a little later (after a few losses and 100+ games) that was not what they were there to do. newton should be able to alleviate some of that concern with his own escapability. i'm hoping we can get in some situations where dyer can see some good mop up action.
ReplyDeletestart reading at the bottom of page 3
ReplyDeletein all likelihood, kiffykin will be bammer's next coach. they seem made for each other. they should be in the market for another placeholder coach in a few years.
ReplyDeleteI have no doubt we will see Dyer this season. He just won't be ready to be the feature back.
ReplyDeleteI like Jet's breakdown of why we might be ranked any particular way.
ReplyDeleteI also could care little about whether we are ranked 20th or 40th by any of the several hundred media outlets that issue rankings.
When was the last time the SEC media picked the eventual champion during the preseason? Probably around 1998? Don't get upset by the silly season.
It seems to me that there will be more parity in the top level of the SEC this season. UF and Bama each will have to reload and prove that it works. More teams seem to be improved than teams that are slipping. This could result in SEC teams bunched with 1-4 losses instead of the gaggle with 5 loses like last season.
If you are a gamebreaker, you'll get in the game even if you aren't the best blocker.
ReplyDeleteThis isn't an era where we can start someone because we feel obligated then when someone outshines then we pull the "well they were struggling with their blocking" card.
If Dyer is a game changer, he'll play, even if he blocks like the RB equivalent of Chris Capps.
the titan could have saved some trees and just said:
ReplyDeletekiffin = lying punk jackass
but i guess lawyers are paid to make the simple complicated so they did their job.
THT ... I missed that contract requirement, so suing the coach makes sense. Proving that Kiffen had knowledge of the clause would be tuff to do. Also SFC has a good point that Kiffen could get away with pleading general and unprovoked ignorance.
ReplyDeleteHoopie, my guess is the SEC championship game will probably be a battle of two 10-2 or 9-3 teams, ending the national title run for the conference.
ReplyDeleteif he can dodge defensive ends like capps, we have a superstar on our hands.
ReplyDeleteWhat's the over/under on how many months before USC dumps Kiffen?
ReplyDeleteI'm saying 27
Just got home from Witnessing a No hitter by Garza.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely not throwing those ticket stubbs away.
next week? bringing a newsworthy lawsuit to town for hiring an oc/rb coach is pretty impressive stuff. just what uscw needs.
ReplyDeleteRK ...word
ReplyDeleteNice Wake!!
ReplyDeleteKiffikin had to know that people in Tennessee were just looking for a way to get back at him. He provided them an excellent opportunity.
ReplyDeleteUSCw had one of their worst seasons in recent memory last year. I don't see Kiffikin getting more than 2 or 3 years if things don't improve. He won't have to win 10 games, but he better win at least 8 or 9 per season. Even then, after a couple of years like that, there will be grumbling. Have a losing season? Update your resume quick.
ReplyDeleteIs anyone really that impressed with the job Kiffikin did at UT? Yea, he gathered an all star staff, but he threw out a lot of bucks to do it. The full Monte was making around $1 Million. Position coaches were making as much as a lot of coordinators. Give me that kind of money to hand out and I could improve UT football.
ReplyDeleteKiffin can recruit, thats what he was brought in to do. Keep the shelves relatively stocked while on probation, so the next coach can return the program to winning when the probation is over.
ReplyDeleteif they can't get NCAA to lighten up the scholly penalty, he's in deep poo.
ReplyDeleteIt's been fun, but I have to leave for work in less than 7 hours, so I should probably head to bed as soon as I finish my diet coke.
ReplyDeleteGood night, Hotties.
Sweet AU dreams to all!
Man it was HOT in AU today. Moved my daughter form her upstairs apartment out on Longleaf to one closer to campus. Got to AU at 9:00am and was done by 1:00pm with the moving part. Hanging pics, curtain rods, clocks, setting up TV's is so draining. I would have rather moved another student than that stuff. However, that sofa looks great in the new apartment. I reminded her that she will be taking that sofa with her after she graduates.
ReplyDeleteLook for a few commits in the coming 2 weeks. Several good ones coming on board very soon.
ReplyDeletei'm reading that same thought elsewhere wtc. good to hear some meaningful corroboration.
ReplyDeletehere da gold at, with a hint of purple
ReplyDeleteMorning, Hotties! Can't wait to hear the news wtc hinted of. It is really starting to feel like football!
ReplyDeleteIt's a beautiful morning!
ReplyDeleteI'm getting less interested in next year's recruits and more interested in seeing how last year's recruits will do on the field. Practice is not far off!
we're broadcasting live from the BuyMore SuperCenter, where most of our customers are completely unaware that there are only 39 days til kickoff!
ReplyDeleteGO TIGERS!!!
WARRRRRRRRR EAGLE!!!
Good morning all.
ReplyDeleteWTC, don't be ashamed to do a little name dropping from time to time. I think J. Rose and the DB from Fl whose name I can't remember are a couple of the guys ready to make the commitment.
Had dreams of Newton running wild and for long touchdowns. Very odd, but very enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteI think Kiffin had UT a much better team at the end of the year than they were at the beginning. He helped mold Crompton into a decent QB.
ReplyDeleteYo Yo.
ReplyDeleteWow, that certainly killed the thread.
ReplyDeleteClearly, Yo Yo is as adept at thread killing as he is on the cello.
ReplyDeleteAlive! It's alive! It's alive!
ReplyDeleteI did 90 REAL pushups today! It was 3 sets of 30, but that is 90 more than I could do when I started boot camp!
ReplyDeleteHAPPY KURT CRAIN #39 DAY HOTTIES!
ReplyDeletebest wishes to our friends at the BuyMore today.
wow Cincy, that's great! i got a little workout in already today too. not 90 push-ups, but something. remind me not to ever make you mad, ok? :)
ReplyDeleteUnder Armour Sideline Gear is apparently out...2010 Auburn Sideline Gear.
ReplyDeleteI kinda like it, but the prices are just getting ridiculous. $40 for a T-shirt. We must no longer be in a recession.
yup, stuff looks good but very pricey. the future bro-in-law said they got in 50 boxes of Under Armour hoodies at the new AU Team Shop yesterday. he said it wasn't fun. i don't believe him.
ReplyDeleteA hoodie right now would be swell.
ReplyDeleteas of right now a car load of AU lovin', Bama haters will be going to the Braves game (7pm ET) on saturday nite, August 14th. then headed to AU for Fan Day on the 15th. if anyone else is interested in meeting up, holla.
ReplyDeletescottie,
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like so much fun! We will be moving our daughter and son-in-law to Montgomery that weekend. I really would like to get over to ATL for a game before Bobby retires.
Oh, and I wouldn't worry about making me mad. I was so dead after doing those 90 pushups, I couldn't have squashed a bug!
wtc's mom sent me an email saying Auburn would get a commitment from some guy named Rose this weekend.
ReplyDeleteGo Braves, and take the Falcons with you....
ReplyDeleteI just read that UA expects to break the 30,000 enrollment mark this year. Time certainly marches on. My freshman year there were a little less than 18,000 and tuition was around $900 a semester.
ReplyDeleteFSJ is no longer invited to attend the Braves game. :P
ReplyDeleteGood morning, FSJ et al.
ReplyDeletewtc's mom sending highly classified crootin tidbits to FSJ?!
30K not surprising when the admission standards are so lax.
ReplyDeletej/k, FSJ. I have no idea what the standards are there, or if they even have any.
THT, I was quite proud of this scoop. Of course any bammer could have called this one since I believe the elder Mr. Rose played for Pat Dye.... :-)
ReplyDeleteTHT,
ReplyDeleteStandards? Who needs standards?
This is about playing some smash mouth football dadgummit. We need playyyyyyerrs...
as long as the news remains good for the majority of Hotties, keep on scoopin', FSJ!
ReplyDeleteI was looking at the recruit rankings and was highly disappointed at the number of "top 100/150" who have committed to ua-t and/or are likely to commit there.
ReplyDeleteThree letters explain that THT:
ReplyDeleteREC
Rose on August 1st.
ReplyDeleteROberson soon after
Looks good for Uzomah within 2 weeks.
That is all for now.
if only you could prove it
ReplyDelete;-)
Yep, Jet said it a while back...
ReplyDeleteFSJ = Exaulted Ruler of the Loyal Order of the Red Elephant
I want to thank whoever posted the TMZ story on Jay Barker, Sara Evans, and her ex on here the other day... (I think it was here). I have laughed for days at Jay's text messages.
ReplyDeleteI could tell you some interesting nuggets about him. I lived in the same apartment complex as his ex in college. I also had an accounting class with him. He showed up on four days as I recall....test days.
Pretty close to a page flip
ReplyDeleteMan, well, it happens.
ReplyDeleteYou know what else happens? Wild violent ostriches across Eurasia.
ReplyDeleteI bought the ostriches because they had a deal running where if you bought 10,000 ostriches, you got a free autographed Yanni CD. Yanni is notorious for not signing stuff, so I would do it again in a heartbeat.
ReplyDeleteSo there I am with 9,998 ostriches (I was a little hungry), not knowing what to do with them. I thought, well, this isn't exactly their natural habitat, I will just release them and let them roam until they die. So that is what I did.
ReplyDeleteThe first ostrich attack video made me laugh. But then more and more reports started piling in. Some deaths occurred. All of that also made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteBut then it happened. An ostrich breached my palace's perimeter. It took a dump on my tomato plant. All those good tomatoes, gone in an instant. That is when I knew the ostrich problem had to be eradicated.
ReplyDeleteOf course, the first thing I wanted to do was return the ostriches to the company that gave them to me with the Yanni CD. They demanded that if I was going to return the ostriches, I had to also return the Yanni CD, also.
ReplyDeleteSo of course, I forged a Yanni signature on another album and sent it back to them. Passed with flyng colors. After I saw how good I was at Yanni signatures, I started signing a bunch of random stuff and selling it on ebay. Made a killing.
ReplyDeleteSo then the company says to me, "OK, send back the ostriches now." I was all like, "Huh? I released them out into the wild. You just accepted ownership of them. Now get your stinking ostriches out of my country or face annihilation at the hands of Eurasia."
ReplyDeleteWell, the company knew better than to try to catch all those ostriches. Instead, they liquidated their assets and went into hiding to avoid Eurasian assassins. Now I've got ostriches everywhere, and I am paying 9 trained assassins out there to look for these stooges to bring justice. I can't wait for this to be over, so I can turn the page.
ReplyDeleteIf I was Sylar, I would definitely have to peek under Michael's lid.
ReplyDelete